Is it a habit or my routine.......?

I am pondering again! Is this a routine or a habit? I am taking a behavior analysis class and we were studying how habits form. Oh my, it seems everything we do is a habit. I know I have talked a lot on this topic and will continue. It is mind blowing. It is almost like my slight obsession about our crazy thoughts in our heads LOL. I need to do a project for my class and either break a habit, or develop a habit, or have someone else involved with the habit but I document the process. I was going ask Louis but thought that might be a bad idea. I became fascinated with a book I read by Stanford Psychologist, Dr. B. J. Fogg’s, Tiny Habits. He explained how to begin a new habit by having an anchor, which reminds us to do the task in which we want to become a habit. Remember my little weights that I keep on my bathtub? Yes, this is to remind me to do my weight repetitions before I get into the shower. It worked. They are still there, and I still lift them. I created the anchor to form a habit. Unfortunately, we have naturally ingrained anchors that trigger our bad habits as well. Such as, if you are bored, have you just ever opened the pantry door? Oops, is that just me? Hmm, what seems interesting in here? Sometimes, I catch myself, and say, I am not hungry, why am I looking in the pantry? So, how do we know if it is a habit or a routine? According to Psychology Today, that while a routine involves repeated behavior, it’s not necessarily performed in response to an ingrained impulse, like a habit is. You might routinely wash the dishes or go to the gym without feeling an impulse, to do so because you feel like you need to do those things. That makes sense. We do things because we chose so conscientiously and planned. Our habits are often unconscious things we do and are not even aware of the anchor that triggers the bad habit. Smoking and overeating are one habits that has a lot of triggers. A smoker tends to be triggered by a drink in hand such a coffee or cocktail, a big meal, a car ride, a tense situation, and even an alarm clock. Yes, there are people who actual light up as soon as they wake up. Drinks and driving seem to be the most common. I found that interesting. Overeating has as many. Both, smoking and overeating are extremely difficult to break but very possible. What makes them the most difficult to break is all the triggers. A smoker cannot just give up all drinks in their hand and or stop driving. An overeater cannot just stop eating. We must look for our triggers to get under control. Any habit can be formed on “unformed.” Remember, habits behaviors running on autopilot. The brain is not used to scrutinizing why a bad habit is carried out. These bad habits are ingrained in our mind due to the rewarding feelings that they bring—or used to bring, when the habit was formed.

So, in order to get ready for my class project, lets dissect again how to form and or break a habit. Let’s discuss how to break a bad habit. First, we should mindfully think about why we engage in the habit in the first place. What are other options? What can we use to replace? What are the triggers? For instance, I use to come home from work, change my clothes, take off my jewelry, put my hair in a ponytail, and pour me a glass of wine. Was this my routine, or a habit that I had formed? I am saying a little of both. The clothes and jewelry part were a routine, the wine pouring was a habit. It had a trigger of a thought going through my brain- “I deserve a glass of wine after dealing with all that today” 🤦‍♂️. I used wine as a reward. Yep, I am calling myself out. What is my excuse now? I do not have the routine, so I usually now just have a glass while cooking or eating dinner. So, discover your bad habit, find what is triggering it, and consciously decide how to remove the trigger. I use trigger for a bad habit or a habit to remove and use anchor for adding a habit. I want to anchor a habit into my routine. That is how I am using the different terms. So, to add a habit, you find something to use as your anchor which is to remind you (trigger your brain). For instance, my dental floss sits near my toothbrush very openly as a reminder or trigger. If I put it in the drawer, I will not floss. Promise. I know. If I am having a party and stick it in the drawer, I might go days before I remember to floss 🤷‍♀️. It just happens. I keep my Calcium tabs where I open to make coffee in the morning as well. If I do not anchor certain things, I will forget to do. I have found that the bad habit triggers are much more complex. They can be in disguise. It can be silly thoughts in our head, like “oh I deserve this ice cream tonight since I at my salad for lunch” or “I deserve to miss my workout” since I walked so much at the mall. Unfortunately, habit or routine, our thoughts sometimes do not serve us well. Another topic for another post, and you know I love to talk about those crazy thoughts in our brains.

What about practicing a habit of more compassion and kindness? I am thinking of ways to trigger myself to be more patient and understanding while waiting in grocery lines or any line.

It does not matter if it is a routine or a habit, what matters is we are better because of it! If it serves us, it is good no matter if it is ingrained or not. If it is a bad habit, let's be curious and find other options. Do we benefit from the habit?

Hope you can find something that you want to start as a new formed “habit”! How about drinking more water? Great place to look into! OR how about adding more kindness in your day. The world would definitely benefit from it.

Have a beautiful day!